A Numbers Game
Well, here we are, feeling a bit more settled in the new home but somewhat UNsettled in my own skin.
I have shared some of my weight issues before but I never got into the numbers because, well, come on. Some things should stay private right?
But I don’t know, along with the privacy comes a sort of…disconnect. If that makes sense? I become overwhelmed with things very easily, and it has become a habit to just bury my head in the sand or look on from the sidelines as if the one who is struggling isn’t really me.
I know how to lose weight. What I have not figured out, though, is how to keep it off, how to live my life in such a way that the weight doesn’t creep back on.
One of my favorite bloggers is Roni. She has lost weight and gotten fit and basically done a 180 in life over the course of 4-5 years. She is really inspiring. Plus, she has a family and her husband is not into eating healthy at all and somehow she manages to cope with that. I can relate. Roni does Weigh-In Wednesdays where she posts a pic of her weight, and for some reason this really resonated with me.
Why don’t I do that too?
So here it is.
Now, here is some perspective on the numbers. My highest weight was 194. 194! I am 5’4″. I was in a size 20. In 2009 we moved cross-country, and over the next 6 months or so I dropped down to 187. Not deliberately, mind you. This was probably from stress because I was not dieting or exercising.
When I started the weight loss program in the spring of 2010, I weighed 187. By December 201o, I weighed 142. This was all diet, no exercise. I was a size 10/12. I think I stayed at 142 for about 2 weeks – seriously. In 2011 I started running and stopped dieting, although I still avoided most carbs. By April 2011, my weight had climbed up to 150. In June I lost my job unexpectedly. By July, I weighed 156.
And that is pretty much where I settled. For the next year my weight bounced between 154 and 158. I was still running, still in a size 12, so I wasn’t too stressed about it. Now, though, this 2-3 pound gain is making me very uncomfortable. My clothes feel tight. I swear I can feel my chin hanging. So it is time to address it.
How? Logging my food. Stocking up on fruits and veggies. Planning our meals AND snacks. Scheduling time to exercise.
Stay tuned for my next weigh in!